Me: Just the tip! The way I like it...
Mom: What?
Me: What.
I just want to start over.
I want to do over my life and make entirely different choices.
I wish my life were a book so I could just go back and edit all the chapters.
I hate my life.
There is nothing good here.
I am nothing.
I have no talent, I have no love, I have the worst luck in the world.
Unless I actually deserve all of this bullshit.
I make the worst choices.
There was only one boy in the whole world who ever loved me and I rejected his love and sometimes I think about it and I panic because what if no one ever loves me again? What if no one ever falls in love with this mess? What if that was my only chance and I blew it because I didn’t quite feel the same way?
Fuck. And it’s not just that aspect.
I hate everything.
What the fuck am I even doing?
I’m so useless.
Literally the only things I’m good at are getting drunk, being emotional, shopping, and sleeping.
I want out.
I want a do-over.
I wish I had done things differently. Maybe then I’d be happier and not such a fucking failure.
isn’t it odd?
none of us choose to be born, but we all have the ability to choose to die
life is so fragile
death is so sudden
life brings joy, yet it is difficult
death brings sadness, yet it is easy
there is so much pain involved in giving birth
yet when you die, it’s peaceful, you’re at rest
both incidents bring about people you never even knew existed
old relatives, long-lost friends, etc.
it’s bizarre when you think about it
